The ups and downs make life worthwhile

So for those of you who may have been concerned about me following my previous post, no need to worry. I'm an optimist by heart, but that day was my pessimist day and there was a part of me that only comes out once in a blue moon that tries to ruin things. It's like my internal pessimist just pops up and goes, "Hey! Regardless of what you may think, your life will always suck, so deal with it!" Yeah, I hate that little guy.

As of now, I'm happy and content with my life. My friends are amazing and I couldn't be happier when it comes to Jared. He really does make me happy and I'm so glad that he's a part of my life. I feel like I'm on the right path in my life and it feels good. Really good. There are only a couple things I would change about my life, and compared to the past, that's awesome. So many people have tons of things they would change, but not me. I'm incredibly blessed!!

Now that I'm through rambling, I'm going to answer some phones, seeing as I'm at work, and find something to leave you with.

"My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations, knowing that the trying of your faith worketh patience. But let patience have perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing." --James 1:2-4

Stew on that and sleep well.

Wouldn't it be nice if life made sense?

So here I am, my life is going great, and then on the drive home from class tonight, my brain starts going in a million different directions. My heart is telling me something different than my head and it's already driving me crazy. Hopefully it works out soon because if not, I'm going to go crazy. My heart is telling me that I should hold on with all my might because I deserve a happy life, but my head is saying that I can only be happy for so long before something goes wrong and things are going back to the way they were. It's like I'm fighting an internal tug of war and I'm not strong enough to keep fighting much longer. Eventually the rope is going to break and I'm afraid that I'm going to be unhappy all around. Why is it that when something good comes along, life has to come right behind it and ruin the moment? I'd love to catch a break sometime.

In spirit of my internal tug of war, I'll leave you with a snippet of sorts from Tuesdays With Morrie. Yes I know, I used that last time, so sue me.

"Life is a series of pulls back and forth. You want to do one thing, but you are bound to do something else. Something hurts you, yet you know it shouldn't. You take certain things for granted, even when you know you should never take anything for granted.

"A tension of opposites, like a pull on a rubber band. And most of us live somewhere in the middle."

Sounds like a wrestling match, I say.

"A wrestling match." He laughs. "Yes, you could describe life that way."

So which side wins, I ask?

"Which side wins?"

He smiles at me, the crinkled eyes, the crooked teeth.

Love wins. Love always wins.




Stew on that and sleep well.

Stop the insanity!

So, I'm sitting at work and I realize something. Fridays suck. Now, I know most of you who are reading this love Fridays, but I'm here to tell you that unless it's the end of your work week, it sucks. Massively. Earlier today was amazing, but this evening has more than made up for the suckiness. This morning Jared and I went to an early lunch and went and saw "Book of Eli" (which, by the way, is awesome) and then he dropped me off at the house and I took a nap. So far so good, right? Right. Well, I get to work and until about 9:30 it's non-stop stupidity! Seriously, someone called me looking for something, I helped them find it and 30 minutes later they call because they were proud they found it again. Really? I'm sorry, I have better things to do than to give you a cookie every time you do something good. Friday also sucks in this place because everyone I usually sit with is off on Friday, so I'm stuck sitting here alone. Yeah, not cool.

Anywho, I'm going to try and find something somewhat inspirational to leave you with. Kind of like ending on a good note. Hopefully I can do this so that way I can get into somewhat of a pattern. All good blogs are more than just a list of what you did that day and who made your hit list for that day. Hopefully you can find something reading mine that will make you laugh, make you cry or anything else on the whole spectrum of emotion. Sometimes I'll have something in my life that will be like God hitting me over the head with some big realization, but days like today will get something that someone else came up with. Hopefully this works out well!

So today I leave you with a quote from one of my favorite books, Tuesdays With Morrie.

"So many people walk around with a meaningless life. They seem half-asleep, even when they're busy doing things they think are important. This is because they're chasing the wrong things. The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning." --Morrie Schwartz

2 down, 1 to go.

Well, I've got 2 classes down. So far my classes seem that they're going to actually be easier than many of my undergrad classes. Here's hopin huh? :o) I'm pretty excited and I really can't wait for the next 3 semesters to be over and done with  so that I can have a degree that I can do something with!

So my big excitement is that in 36 days I'm going down to Florida. It's just going to be me going down to spend the weekend with my grandparents. I'm excited to go down there and spend some time with them and enjoy just being there. I'm really excited!

OK, I have nothing insightful tonight, so goodnight!

First day jitters...wasn't that supposed to end at Kindergarten?

So I'm sitting here trying to go to sleep, but I don't think that's going to happen right now. For one, Jacey is completely restless, but the main reason is that for some reason I'm nervous about starting school again tomorrow. I've spent so much time in school that you'd think that the whole jitters thing would have gone away by now, but definitely not this semester. I don't know if it's because it's my first semester in grad school, because I've taken a semester off and feel out of practice or if I'm just a dork. It's possible that it's all three!

Complete 180...

When I was creating my blog, I was apparently oblivious to the fact that you have to name the blog and come up with a URL. Silly me! When it came time for me to choose the URL, I was looking around the room trying to come up with some inspiration, but with no luck. Suddenly, out of the air Operation Ashley comes to mind, so I give it a whirl and it's available. I didn't really think anything of it, all I thought was that it sounds kinda spiffy. (Yes, I just said spiffy) Well, to make a long story short, it hit me tonight. My life is like Operation Ashley. God has an ongoing plan for me and I imagine that if my life's plan was in a folder in some heavenly file cabinet, it would be titled Operation Ashley.

Stew on that and sleep well!

My first post...quick grab the camera!

Well, I'm attempting to start a blog, I'm not sure how it's going to go, but I'm going to give it an honest effort. I don't really know that my life is interesting enough to blog about, but in my past experience, this has proven to be a very therapeutic experience. I don't really have a whole lot to say right now, but I wanted to get this thing set up.